i worked from 0630 to 1830 today. a fucking 12hours with only an hour of lunch break. i enjoyed it. nothing else was on my mind for 12hours. in these 12hours, i've met difficulties and unreasonable people. i dealt with it. i bitch about it. it's over. i feel good. had a few good jokes over dinner. everything was good. but, loneliness just have to set in. reality just have to remind me that i'm still lonely. life as a single is definitely cool but it's still a lonely one. i miss G.

noted something. singaporeans just have this habit of thinking that we are at the top of the world for the smallest achievement we get. i can have mr singaporean and mr american having the same achievement in work but mr singaporean will be making alot of nonsensical requests and shout at people who are helping them whereby mr american will appreciate even for the things you are supposed to do for him. watch that attitude people. so when we singaporeans walk into a restaurant, all in our mind is that we are the customers. have we forgotten that the waiter is a human too? have we forgotten that he is there to help us enjoy our food? try bringing food from the kitchen to your own table personally.

one thing i learnt today. don't question the messanger. he's just there to pass the message. and don't you vent your anger on him. you are going to be a messanger some of these days.

always think that whatever you have is a bonus. think about how you are going to handle everything without everything else. in this manner, you are going to enjoy and appreciate each day and everything. be contented.

when is the darkest period of my life everyday? it's before, after work and just before i go to bed. why? just before i work, i will tell myself to leave every other emotions behind. what other emotions do i have besides G? after work, i just don't have someone to let me bitch about what happened and there's no someone to tell me about how her day went by. just before i sleep, i can't even hear the voice i so much wanted to hear. life is bad to me sometimes.

women lingerie are meant to be seen. isn't that true? when we go to departmental stores, don't we see the bra and panties hanging proudly there? so what about the men's basics? it's kept in boxes and we have to choose based on those diagrams, and photographs. so unfair. hrmp!

hey, don't worry. you will be xing fu. if i can, i will bring kuai le to you. remember, i will always be there to (help?) support you. i just want to tell you i love you, is it so hard?

it's a relaxing sunday!!!!!!!!!

just sitting around, playing aimless games with somebody whom you just want to spend the rest of your sundays with.

life is good to me today.

i think i'm quite a biased person.

last night, i was talking to a friend. she kept on going on and on about her life, her views and everything. i actually got so irritated that i made sarcastic remarks. then, i called G. i was just telling her how i hate people who go on and on about their life. then i made her go on and on about her life. hmmm?

i appreciate her sms last night. all i did was tell her i was feeling down on friday night and the next thing i know, i received a sms on saturday giving me some encouragement. i felt good.

i don't know if i'm the only that she told about the problem. i hope i am. even if i'm not, i'm glad enough that she let me took a peep into her heart. the day i enter it, i'm going to stay there and keep it strong.

cycling dislocated and injured my wrist. it hurt me. but i just wish i can go back cycling again. why? because i know i love cycling.

after much thinking process and sharing sessions with friends,

M, i'm sorry. i wasn't sincere about you. i knew it the first day. MS can vouch for it. she knew. i love being with you. you are a great girl. i can confide in you. you show me life. yes. all these but everything wasn't just right. she's still in my mind always. i hope i hadn't treat you like a spare tire. honestly, i didn't but i don't want to be a swine and begin treating you like one. you are great. i wouldn't want to influence your life. go on. be good.

G. you are still on my mind. you still makes my heart skip a beat. you still makes me forgo my precious sleep just to think about you. you still give me the urge to call you in the middle of the night just to hear your voice. you still give me assurance. i miss you.

you have rejected me before. i knew it's still not the time to ask. but i try. why? because i knew i love you. honestly, i still pray for you. i miss those days we describe each other room. i miss those days we counted stars together. i miss those days when i call you everyday. i miss those days when i bitch about life to you. truly, i love you.

will you?

5 sailors were trapped in an island. they found alot of coconuts. they piled them up together and went to sleep.

the 1st sailor woke up, decided to divide the coconuts into 5 equal shares. after dividing equally, he was left with 1 coconut which he threw to the monkey. after that, he decided to bury his own share and left the 4 shares of coconut there.

the 2nd sailor woke up, saw the 4 shares of coconut, decided to be fair. he mixed the 4 shares together and divide them equally into 5 equal shares. again, he was left with 1 which he gave the monkey. subsequently he hid his own share.

the 3rd sailor woke up, saw the 4 shares of coconut, decided to be fair. he mixed the 4 shares together and divide them equally into 5 equal shares. again, he was left with 1 which he gave the monkey. subsequently he hid his own share.

that's exactly what happened when the 4th and 5th sailor woke up.

the next morning, they woke up together, saw the 4 shares of coconut. they came to a consensus. they mixed the 4 shares together and divided them equally into 5 shares. again, they are left with 1 extra and they gave it to the monkey.

so, how many coconut did they find right at the start?

try this and let me know how to please...............

"acting on a good idea is better than having one." -robert half

i'm confused. i'm lost. should i change the subject i'm going to take in university next year? i would very much love to study engineering, for interest sake. i'm not going to become some hardcore engineer. i hated work local engineers go through. the only chance you see me working as an engineer would probably be with some racing team, car manufacturer or stuff like that. i'm not going to sit in office all day long trying to explain things to people and using my knowledge to improve on something. engineer supposed to come up with new fascinating stuff! however, majoring in engineering in local university would mean that i have to fight with those china dudes, with at least a year of advantage, for honours. and honours can mean so much to my payslip.

since i was in training school, i wanted to strive to get the ATA to go overseas for study. it was on a 65% for exposure and 45% for payslip reasoning. i thought this dream was over when i failed my second theory paper. fortunately, thanks to the hardwork before, i was still 9th among the course. this fact make me want to strive harder here in the squadron. i worked hard. it was recognised and appreciated. i was just having the motivation to go on when my instructor has to tell me this. "i'm failing you not because you fail. it was mainly because you didn't do as well compared to normal days. since you can do it, just take it as a free one and go for the resit." omg! i wanted to explode. it wasn't the ability to pass at the resit. it is what's recorded on paper that's important. since my 64-45% reasoning for overseas study is thinning away, now i'm thinking of three options.
1) to make use of the award i have now and top it up myself for an overseas education. consideration : i've have to work to pay off debts the moment i return.
2) change the course of my local study to something which can get me honours easier or something worth the money. consideration : i sucks in things i'm not interested in.
3) stay along with how things are going on now and just nerd my way through university. considerations : i don't know how well i'm going to handle it but i probably want to have a more meaningful university memory and probably i'm going to meet my future wife there.

tough hur. it's never easy. thankfully i have this break this weekend. if not, i'm not sure when i'm going to experience burn-out. now that i'm recharged, i better produce some standards. it was quite a bad week. i was distracted all the time. thankfully all these distractions are clear after sitting by the riverside watching the world go by early saturday morning. i'm ready for more.

"curiousity has its own reason for existing. the important thing is not to stop questioning. never lose a curiousity." -albert einstein

when the going gets tough, the tough gets going. come get me.